In Defence Of Premature Hot Cross Buns: Don't Like Them? Don't Eat Them.
When it comes to hot cross buns, you can't have too much of a good thing.
Australians descended into fury yesterday when shelves of hot cross buns began appearing in supermarkets across the country.
Supermarket giant Coles was at the eye of the storm after they announced their 'Boxing Day Buns' -- standard ol' hot cross buns available from, you guessed it, Boxing Day.
There's nothing special about these buns. They're not Christmas coloured or festively decorated. They don't plummet down your chimney complete with reindeer bites. All they are is a marketing ploy, and oh lord did it work.
Customers hit the roof, accusing the bun's premature appearance of being an 'insult to their intelligence' and a swipe at beloved Easter traditions.
The announcement went positively viral, largely driven by commenters expressing their disdain for a pre-March hot cross bun.
People were properly pissed. And to them I say one thing: are you out of your mind?
A warm, bready, fruity delight has no business existing only within oppressive confines. May the buns be hot and the icing be crossed all year round.
Christians understood the bun to be a metaphor for Jesus Christ. The cross represented crucifixion and the spices the embalming of his body. Which sounds truly horrifying but significant all the same.
I appreciate the history and the customs. I too bobbed along to "Hot cross buns, Hot cross buns, One a penny two a penny, Hot cross buns" in kindergarten, complete with crisscross hand motions and all.
But Easter in itself is such an unpredictable holiday that I'd argue there's plenty of wriggle room for traditions to evolve.
Do you think Jesus ever expected that on the week he performed the greatest encore of all time and was later crucified, we would commemorate the events with chocolate rabbits and primary school children parading silly hats with small yellow chickens?
We are all to blame for the Boxing Day Buns. Supermarkets have been rolling out year-round buns for months. First launching an off-season batch on December 28, 2018, Coles saw 2.1 million buns sold within four days.
Whinge all you like, but the numbers don't lie -- there are clearly plenty beside me on board the pro-yearly buns train.
Is it ridiculous they've been called Boxing Day Buns? Absolutely. (I eagerly await 'Bank Holiday Buns' and 'Hot Cross Proclamation Day'.) It's a thinly-veiled cash grab -- but one that provides us with oozy, soft-baked goodness. So take my money.
Rival supermarkets aren't quite as peachy keen to role out premature hot cross buns (or 'Boxing Day Buns') as Coles, but they're certainly not abiding by the Easter time rule either.
You can expect to see them in Woolworths stores from January 2, and Aldi from January 8.
Hot cross buns are a 1,500-year-old staple. But no matter how impassioned those of you in the anti-yearly-bun camp are, you're clearly losing the battle.
So come to the dark side. We have buns.
Featured Image: Getty