My Family And Meghan Markle's Are Basically The Same
The Markle debacle is actually making many of us feel quite normal and proving a no-filter reminder that family can be very complicated, sad and messy.
Family in-fighting, dirty laundry aired for the entire world to see and enough drama to rival an episode of Keeping up with the Kardashians. Welcome to the Royal Wedding.
And one thing’s for sure, this pickle Meghan Markle finds herself in days before the biggest day of her life is as relatable to us commoners as Kate Middleton sporting cute ASOS Maternity dresses during her pregnancies.
As the stunning American actress prepares to wed Prince Harry, the precious days in the lead-up to her nuptials have been tarred by uncomfortable family conflict played out across international media for the whole wide world to see.
And although most of us, touch wood, don’t have relatives pimping dirty laundry to the tabloids or setting up pap shots, the Markle debacle is actually making many of us feel quite normal and proving a no-filter reminder that family can be very complicated, sad and messy.
I’ve come to the conclusion Meghan and I are basically the same.
We have different variations of the same name, I love Suits and she starred in it, she has the Prince and I have a frog and I now know we both come from estranged families. Thankfully, unlike Markle, my issues, and I have more than Vogue, aren’t on show for every man and his dog to see.
Psychologist Sabina Read says the Markle themes of conflict like jealousy, hurt, estrangement, blended family dynamics and financial pressures are universal.
“That this conflict is playing out on the world stage with royal protocols to be followed only adds fuel to the fire but it’s also important to acknowledge that marriage is the blending of two families which always means renegotiating and navigating two sets of traditions, expectations, family cultures, hopes and dreams,’’ she told me.
“This can make wedding plans even more loaded as each partner, and possibly their respective family members, each may attempt to create boundaries while respecting their partner and their own family of origin narrative.
"Arguments are rarely about money but more about what money represents such as success, security, freedom, or even the ability to help others. If our representation of money differs from family members, it makes sense that conflict will arise.”
Major celebrations like a wedding, Christmas or milestone birthday, and the pressure which can be deeply felt, often fuels family conflict according to Read.
“These occasions can often trigger conflict because family members may manage to keep their distance and maintain largely separate lives until they are forced to come together often with a host of pressures, expectations, and unhealed wounds ripe for re-infection,’’ she said.
So, whether father Thomas Markle rises from his hospital bed to walk his daughter down the aisle on Saturday, or mother Doria Ragland gives Meghan away at Windsor Castle, I wish the 36-year-old a stress-free wedding day sans unnecessary family drama.
The eyes of the world will be fixed on the soon-to-be Her Royal Highness Princess Henry of Wales, every last detail of the big day, her choice of dress and members of the wedding party (oh hey, Pippa Middleton, if you’re reading this!) will be dissected within an inch of its life and analysed, fodder for live television broadcasts, countless column inches and social media commentary.
The last thing Meghan Markle needs is her relatives taking the gloss off her wedding day and filling her mind and body with stress. May her family leave their issues and agendas at the castle gates and forever hold their peace.