Bed Cinema Opens In Switzerland Presuming People Can Be Trusted

The sheets will hopefully be changed very regularly

What you need to know
  • How good are movies?
  • How good is bed?
  • Let's put beds in cinemas!
  • No, people cannot be trusted.

It’s hard to get people out of the house to go to movies anymore. Why leave the house when you can just stay in bed and watch Netflix or, even better, the best show in the world, The Project? (Sorry, the network made me write that).

A representation of being in bed.

The point is, people want to be able to watch movies from the comfort of a bed. And a forward-thinking cinema in Switzerland has found an creative way to achieve this – they’ve replaced seats with beds. Genius!

Cinema Pathe in the town of Spreitenbach has come up with the “VIP Bedroom Experience,” which is kind of like Gold Class, except with beds and more syllables.

Much like Switzerland's cheese, there is a hole in this plan. Aren’t those sheets going to get really gross really quickly? To answer that question: almost certainly.

But, don’t worry, the CEO of Pathe Switzerland is very much aware of your concerns. “Hygiene is very important to us,” Venanzio Di Bacco has told news website 20 Minuten. He also added that the concept has been tested abroad and that they have “had no problems so far.” Of course, the key words there being ‘so far.’

The operators have told customers that the beds are freshly made after each movie, though a more hygienic practice would involve burning the sheets to ashes and shooting the remains into outer space. In this writer’s opinion, there are bedsheets in 2-star motels that will be cleaner than those sheets after a screening of The Notebook.

The price for one of the beds is about $73, and it includes free food and drink. Though it is probably best to pop on a hazmat suit, update your health insurance to the premium package and get booster shots of all your vaccinations before giving it a go.