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Ding Dong Merrily On High: Plug Pulled On Christmas Jingle Balls

One Kansas woman decided to erect more than just her Christmas tree this festive season.

After decorating her home in the suburb of Johnson County, 24-year-old Shelby Gash found she had 60 feet of leftover Christmas lights with no particular purpose.

It was then she had what you might call a lightbulb moment for an extra display on top of her home’s roof.

Is it chestnuts roasting on an open fire? (Image: Shelby Lynn Gash via Facebook)
Is it chestnuts roasting on an open fire? (Image: Shelby Lynn Gash via Facebook)

So what did she suggest this luminous object was? A sleigh ready to be hooked up to some reindeer? Some Christmas baubles? At least a euphemism?

“It’s a giant glowing dick,” Shelby stated matter-of-factly.

"The neighborhood's kind of like, vibe's kind of gone down, 'cause everyone's kind of uptight," she told local TV station WDAF. "So it's more of a, kind of, orneriness."

Shelby Gash: not beating around the bush (Image: WDAF)
Shelby Gash: not beating around the bush (Image: WDAF)

Neighbour Christi Vergara hadn’t seen the display until the reporter showed her a photo – and it’s lucky she didn’t see it while driving past.

“I probably would’ve wrecked my car… laughing,” she said.

But as amused as she was, Christi pointed out that that it wasn’t appropriate for little kids.

“It’s a joke that wears out pretty quick,” added her husband Marcelo.

Shelby said that people were stopping in the middle of the night, taking photos and laughing. But after hearing that it might upset neighbours with young children, Shelby sadly flicked the switch on her festive phallus after just four days.

“Sorry if it’s actually really bothering people, I’m just trying to make a laugh,” she said.

Ho ho ho!