Patriots Win Unbelievably Boring Super Bowl

The New England Patriots Have Won The Super Bowl. Actually, make that the Snore Bowl.

They told us that Super Bowl LIII between the New England Patriots and Los Angeles Rams would be the greatest spectacle since David took on Goliath in a slingshot battle.

They said it would be the ultimate test of skill and power and zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.... sorry, we just fell asleep while writing that sentence.

The truth is, it has been a massively over-hyped snorefest which for the record, the Patriots won 13-3.

Wait, did we just say "snorefest? Apologies. The term "fest" would imply that some sort of festivities had occurred, and this dreary excuse for a football game was  anything but festive.

Have you ever watched question time in Parliament House? RIVETING compared to this Super Bowl.

Paint drying? Grass growing? The NBN being rolled out? All of these things happen at the speed of lightning compared to what these so-called athletes were doing out there at Mercedes-Benz Stadium in Atlanta.

READ MORE: Brazilians Have The Cheekiest Name For Tom Brady

God, even the stadium has a boring name. And the halftime show was as boring as bat-you-know-what too.

We'll post a match report here if we wake up before the thing ends. If anyone cares, the Patriots currently lead 13-3. The Rams had a chance to tie things up earlier in the fourth quarter, but they looked too bored to get it right.

The "highlights", if you can call them that, are above.

READ MORE: What People Are Eating As They Watch The Super Bowl Is Out Of Control

Oh, and what do you know. The Patriots just won. And Tom Brady has won ANOTHER Super Bowl ring -- his sixth if you really care.

And seriously, could anything be more boring than that?

We give up and are going home to stare at some walls, which should be far more entertaining than the junk we just watched in Atlanta.