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'I Found That Really Difficult': Ada Nicodemou On The Hardest Part Of Her Stillbirth

'Home and Away' star Ada Nicodemou has opened up about the loss of her son Harrison in 2014 and the subsequent breakdown of her marriage.

In an interview with Stellar, the actress has spoken in great detail about the "extremely difficult" time she went through after delivering a stillborn baby, an experience that left her questioning whether she'd ever be able to smile again.

The 42-year-old was eight months pregnant when she gave birth to stillborn son, Harrison, brother to Johnas, who is now seven-years-old.

"The past five years really tested my positive personality. Life will never be the same again; there will obviously be a hole in your heart," she told the magazine.

"We will always remember that child and what could have been."

Ada said during one of the most difficult times of her life, she was heavily supported by her mother and brother, knowing she "had to be strong" for Johnas.

"I just get so choked up. I think it’s nice that he’s keeping his little brother’s memory alive, but now I say, 'It actually hurts Mummy when you keep going on about it'," she said of speaking to her eldest about the loss of his brother.

But it was conversations with strangers and confronting her loss that Ada found the most difficult.

"A lot of people come up and say sorry about Harrison, but I found that really difficult because I don't want to breakdown in front of them," Ada said.

"I've had counselling, and I've just gone back again. It's going to be an ongoing thing because I want to get in a better place where I don't freeze up when he's mentioned."

Ada said in addition to her "really great family", throwing herself into her work and having a busy schedule filming with 'Home and Away' helped to fill her time.

'Home and Away' has been my saving grace. We are like a family. We all really genuinely like each other. And we have fun. I mean... we're not curing cancer.

Ada and her husband at the time, Chrys Xipolitas, announced they were expecting their second child, a baby boy, in March of 2014.

She tragically suffered stillbirth in August of the same year and her marriage with Chrys ended in 2016.

Ada and Chrys has been married for nine years at the time of their divorce and had faced a difficult path together, having also suffered a miscarriage before welcoming Johnas in 2012 through IVF.

Ada has been dating businessman Adam Rigby for three years and after all she has been through, feels like she is finally "really happy".

"I feel I’ve come through the other end. Everything has fallen into place. Johnas is really happy... I’m really happy," Ada said.

"I’m smiling again. And I’ve got this great relationship. I’m a hopeless romantic. Life hasn’t beaten that out of me."

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