Abbie Chatfield Opens Up About Having An Abortion Nine Months Before 'The Bachelor'
'The Bachelor' runner up has talked about why she found it difficult to open up about having children when discussing family with Matt Agnew on the show.
Abbie's reluctance to talk about wanting to have a family while appearing on 'The Bachelor' contributed to fans believing she was only there for fame and to grow her social media following.
Yet appearing as a guest on pop culture podcast 'Shameless', Abbie told host Michelle Andrews and Zara McDonald that her reluctance came after she had an abortion in March last year, which she told Matt about during a single date.
“I think at that time I felt very guilty for saying I wanted kids because I aborted one,” Abbie said.
“(It was) bringing it up with Matt, being embarrassed, being ashamed, being scared that he would think of me differently, as well as being so exhausted of having to explain why I hadn’t said whether I wanted kids to these girls.”
I hadn’t said that I didn’t but I wasn’t being like ‘I can’t wait to have babies’ because nine months before I had aborted one and I felt guilty.
“I whispered it to him and his producer didn’t hear me and said ‘Abbie you’re going to have to say it out loud’. And then I turned around and looked dead in the camera and said ‘I had a f***ing abortion last year’.”
Abbie said after she told Matt about her abortion she lay crying in the foetal position in her bed, adding that at the time of having the procedure, her boyfriend told her she "wasn't fun anymore" with the experience leading to her developing a "deep depression".
“(He) was literally the worst. He went out the night I had my abortion because he wanted to be the boys and have a few drinks even though I was holding onto his shirt saying please don’t leave me,” she said.
Abbie said she begged producers not to air the conversation about her abortion on the show which she claims they agreed to do.
"I didn't want the conversation to be aired because I feared public backlash, and I was also dealing with the inner shame myself still at that time," Abbie told 10 daily. "I also had people in my life who were close to me who didn't know that it had happened. It was something I kept somewhat of a secret."
Abbie added that Matt's reaction to the conversation was great and that he was extremely supporting, insisting that it didn't change anything between them at the time and that she shouldn't feel ashamed.
"I think because Matt was so great about the fact that I had had an abortion it only made my time [on 'The Bachelor' easier]. He finally was able to understand the questions around whether or not I wanted kids and knowing that I had shared that with him made me feel more comfortable around him," she told 10 daily.
Abbie said she's now decided to go public with her abortion experience to help other women who have done the same and break down the stigma surrounding it.
"To any woman who has had an abortion I would like to say that you are not alone, you are not a bad person and you do not need to feel shame for a decision you made about your body," she told 10 daily.
"Many more women than you realise have had abortions, and I understand that it is not an easy decision that is taken lightly. I just hope that I have started at least one conversation around abortion that can lead to breaking down the stigma."
Featured image: Network 10