‘Five Bedrooms’ Episode 6 Recap: Fifty F**king Candles
Half a century old and not a day wiser.
Everyone celebrates milestone birthdays differently. Some people like to celebrate for an entire week. Some like to just bashfully let the day pass with a quiet dinner and a gathering of friends. Everyone is different.
This week, Heather celebrated turning 50 the only way our favourite five housemates know how to party: with a huge f**king mess.
With that in mind, let’s rank how our housemates did this week, from worst to best.
Ainsley - 5
Let’s just get this out of the way, Ainsley has had a really rough go for the DURATION of ‘Five Bedrooms’. The beating heart and soul of the household, like Sisyphus, has been forced to roll a huge boulder of sh*t up sh*t mountain, day after day.
Rebounding from Lachlan to Ben was never the best plan, but the way things, unfortunately, unfolded for Ainsley this week, overhearing Ben and Heather’s dalliances in front of a crowd, was definitely heartbreaking. Feeling somewhat betrayed by both Heather AND Liz, on top of the heartbreak, sent her into a downward spiral. And when you’re headed for rock bottom there’s only one place to go… to the WORST GUY IN THE WORLD.
This show is so good that I’ve been able to mentally separate Hugh Sheridan the man and Lachlan the devil incarnate. Well done, writers. Well done, my undying love for Hugh Sheridan.
Harry - 4
Things with Ainsley definitely went south this week, and she wasn’t the only one. After his attempts to come out to his mum were thrown out when -- in an awful twist of fate -- she suffered a stroke, Harry probably wasn’t expecting to have it blurted out in front of her this week.
During Heather’s surprise party, which was packed full of surprises for everyone involved, there was the obvious revelation that Ben and Heather had been doing the deed, meanwhile, Harry was like:
Then there was the added revelation that Ben was in love with Heather and Harry was like:
Then there was the accidental outing of Harry in front of his mum and… there’s no real funny screenshot for that.
It’ll be interesting to see how the dapper doctor and his strong-willed mum will handle things next week, but it was absolutely heartbreaking to see a shocked Manuj’s response to Harry’s sexuality. Even more so around her attempts to assert her independence despite her ailing health.
Heather - 3
Birthdays can be tough, dealing with exes can be tough, having feelings for someone -- especially when it’s complicated as hell -- can be, you guessed it, tough. It’s a wonder Heather even made it through this week dealing with all of that combined.
Her and Colin’s relationship continues to get more and more complex as the pair attempt to move on in their own ways. We also got a bit of time to get to know Rhonda. God, does this show know how to create some incredible secondary characters, and ever since Liz’s old boss Roz went from icon to “I can’t (work with someone who is bankrupt)” I’ve been yearning for a new queen, and Rhonda definitely fits the bill.
Still, things went from bad to worse to curiously interesting for Heather this week. Rather than an admission of love for Ben, Heather’s 50th became an admission of wanting to love herself. It was a pretty great moment, to see her vulnerable and honest with Ben -- and Liz -- and just made me love her even more.
Oh, also we learned more about what Heather does for a living. I just thought she was incredibly fond of smocks, not realising that was a uniform.
Liz - 2
Like a Dickensian spectre, Liz was everywhere this week. All she needed was some rusty chains to rattle at the end of Heather’s bed to make the look complete.
It’s been fun to watch the evolution of Liz (evoLiztion?) who went from a cold fixture in the house to an unintentional venting post for the other housemates. After catching Heather trying to escape from Ben’s room in last week’s episode, Liz became a hesitant ally for Heather as she attempted to figure out what she wanted.
There’s also no better symbol of friendship than wordlessly pouring a glass of red for a friend in need.
Ben - 1
Yeah our favourite tradie has made some interesting choices this week and YES we could have penalised him for the unintentional outing of Harry, or the unintentional hurt of Ainsley but -- honestly -- when a man decides to build someone a zen garden… I mean… that’s pretty adorable.
Did anyone else go from thinking Ben and Heather were the strangest match to hoping you get an invite to their wedding? Gotta go picture what Heather’s bridal smock would look like now.