Australian Survivor 2018: We Just Got Blindsided, Baby!


After last night saw the breakup of dream team #Shonella following Fenella’s elimination (*sob*), we’re now down to our final five in Survivor: Champions v Contenders!

READ MORE: Fenella: "Maybe I Should've Looked For An Idol Instead Of Eating Paw Paw"

READ MORE: Australian Survivor 2018: RIP Our Fave Power Couple

Following her orchestration of manipulation which saw the majority vote for Sharn, effectively causing Fenella to be eliminated thanks to Sharn's sneaky idol, Shane Gould is pretty damn chuffed with herself.

And honestly, she should be.

That's was one helluva gameplay -- and let's be real -- who didn't love seeing King Grubby's reaction once he realised his own plan had failed??? Iconic, really.

Anyway, with Fenella off to the jury villa, Shane and Shonee begin to ~bond~, so we shall now refer to them as #Shanonee. It... doesn't have quite the same ring to it but it'll do!

Shane feels that after losing her BFF, Shonee will want revenge on Brian -- and she is all for it, of course! Especially since King Grub well and truly lives up to his name by not helping with the fire, cooking, or cleaning the rice pot, and by just being a dirty grub in general.

Sharn and Shane hope to bring Shonee over to their alliance, so Sharn wastes no time in going in with her mad lawyer skilllllzzz to win Shonee over (good lord, try saying that out loud three times!).

Shonee now realises that Brian's plan was to take the two physically weakest people -- Mon and Shane -- with him into the final three, and he was planning on getting rid of her at this point. So she is OUT FOR BLOOD!!

But not to worry, she says, she's a ~sassy bitch~ who always gets what she wants, and we love that. Queen!

She also tells us we haven't seen the end of #Shonella, so we're excited about that, too.

It's time for tonight's reward challenge, and the prize is.... a car??

Which, like, is awesome -- but after months of eating rice on a desert island I'd be hoping for some lit buffet, but each to their own, I guess...

I mean,  you could sleep in it for the rest of the competition instead of those dank sandy shelters they've got going on which might be nice??

But you can't eat a car...??

ANYWAY, the challenge involves a word puzzle, climbing on a beam, and sandbags. I dunno, it's always confusing AF until we actually see them doing it.

The whole beam part of the challenge looks insanely difficult -- not to mention I can't stop thinking about how many splinters you'd get trying to shimmy yourself up that thing????

Mon is having a sh*tload of trouble on it and keeps falling, and we can feel her frustration from here.

Also, Jono says "Brian is struggling to get his pole up" and surely he's doing this on purpose???

Oh wow, surprise. Brian wins. He hugs Mon and whispers, "Last two, if I win, that car is yours, okay?" and weird but ok.

Turns out, Brian on top of a brand-spanking new car, he wins a night away from camp complete with a bed and pizza -- and he chooses Monika to join the festivities with him.

Shane's just like mehhh, because this means she and Sharn have the perfect opportunity to lure Shonee to their alliance.

Over at Reward Beach, we soon find out that Brian didn't take Mon with his because he's a nice guy, he says it's because "she's a sheep and easily persuaded." Oh.

In fact, he's pretty bloody confident with his ability to keep Mon and Shonee on his side, but we know on Survivor nothing ever goes to plan, and that's why we love it.

Back at camp, Shonee tells Shane and Sharn she's "100% keen to get Brian out" and they dub themselves the "Shh Alliance" (SHarn, SHane and SHonella, geddit??).

SHHHisters are doin' it for themselves.

Back at Reward Beach, Mon tells us she's not blind to the fact that Brian is using her in his strategy to become Sole Survivor.

It's time for the Immunity Challenge, which involves building a fire -- and can Brian even make a fire?? Pretty sure we haven't seen him anywhere near the campfire this entire season, so this should be INTERESTING...

Surprise!!! Turns out Brian can't make a fire to save his life, and Shane and Sharn are absolutely killing it.

Like, they've both lit a big fire and basically filled up and entire bucket of water while the other three haven't even made a spark.

Sharn wins! Our fire queen!

Back at camp, Brian declares that Shane Gould will be going home tonight, and ummm no we don't think so, bud!!!

He tells the others he's going off in search of "paw paws" and "idols hanging off trees" and tells us that he's actually just acting to make it look like he's panicking. Which we don't think anyone would even... whatever.


Brian tries to rope Shonee in to vote off Shane with him, but little does he know Shonee is now part of the SHHHH alliance!!!

Shane pretends to be worried for herself, and honestly, she does a better job "acting" than Brian does. Champion of swimming and of our hearts!!!

It's time for TRIBAL COUNCIL... and it's honestly SO adorable when Shonee sees Fenella over in the jury. #Shonella lives on forever in our hearts!!!


During the usual back and forth at Tribal, Brian mentions he picked Mon to share his reward because he didn't want her alone with the others to give her a chance to change her mind, and he's like "I've got confidence in Shonee that she won't go over to Shane and Sharn," and huns just you wait!!

Jono goes to count the votes, and asks if anyone has an Idol they want to play... and Brian whips the one he found a found a few episodes back, and everyone else is like...

Especially Shane, who is absolutely hating life at this point and is like...


Jono reads the votes... There are two votes Shane, two votes Mon...????


Friends, I think we ALL just got blindsided. Give these girls an Oscar and colour us SH-SH-SHOOK!

Also, Commando drops another gold one-liner from the jury, saying, "Brian's GONE!" and again we reiterate -- WHERE WAS THIS SASS WHEN HE WAS ACTUALLY IN THE GAME?!?!

See you next week.